Happy Bank Holiday!

Happy Bank Holiday!

After a very quiet few months from me I’ve been feeling more like putting pen to paper or should I say, tapping keyboard – not half so romantic sounding.

I’m sitting here at the end of a perfect Bank Holiday.  The weather has been fantastic and I’ve been out with my family enjoying a visit to our local Naval Heritage Centre. By the far the coolest exhibits where the utterly marvellous figureheads. They were housed in a very unassuming workshop and were the very last display we were to visit, which helped greatly to restore my fourteen year old's sons better humour. It  was great to stumble upon these colourful slightly grotesque wooden ‘statues’ reaching perhaps five metres high.  The figure heads traditionally stood at the bow of the ship and seemed to personify  it. Some were mythical Gods such as Sybil and others were royal replicas such as Queen Victoria and probably the most ostentatious King William IV standing magnificent but almost hidden in the corner. To me these  wonderfully ornate and characterful carvings are totally undersold. They are a fabulous part of our maritime history and surely  tourists from across the world would flock to see them if they only knew they were there!

It was great that the Bank Holiday weekend finished so well. Things hadn’t looked so promising. On Friday I noticed that a neighbour opposite was doing strange things to his wall. His corner property was surrounded by a high brick, white plastered wall around two and a half metres. He had built a couple of pillars at either end and I could see that he had decided that he wanted to create similar pillars at regular intervals around the wall. He had marked out very accurately where he wanted the pillars to stand around six or so and somehow he was going to calve out and remove the bricks he didn’t need from the solid wall, a difficult, probably long and dirty job. I wondered when he was proposing to do this work? Nothing happened on Saturday great, sensible man.

Sunday  morning began with the sound of the buzz saw and this continued most of the day. My neighbour who was closer to him wasn’t  impressed! Remarking at least we could be grateful that the wind wasn’t a westerly or the dust would have been blowing across our houses and gardens. Yes, fine for us but what about the poor neighbour who lived next door! The noise stopped around 5pm and on my way out I noticed that he seemed to have managed to cut into the wall and I guess loosened  the squares to create each pillar. He had got much further that I thought he would.  A small consolation as I was pretty sure he would continue again next day!

When I heard the saw start up again this morning I started to feel very irritated! How could he not see that firstly, this was a ridiculous idea and secondly that it was grossly unfair to subject the neighbours to this terrible noise all weekend. Had any one complained? Was it worth going over there now that he was already more than half way through the job? Could I telephone and complain to the Council about noise pollution right now! I knew we would be out for a good part of the day so it wouldn’t be too bad but as we got ourselves organised I could hear the saw and then the bashing as I imagined him knocking down the bits of wall he didn’t want. I mused that what a shame he didn’t realise that while he would probably love his wall because of all the extremely hard work he was putting in, all around him the neighbours would hate it (and possibly him too!) Why hadn’t he thought through the consequences of his actions on everyone around him?  I felt him to be the sort of man who has some good ideas (the rest of his house and garden were looking great) but also some bad ideas. Not a problem in itself, I recognise that in myself.  It’s only a problem if we decide to act on all our ideas without discussing them and listening to feedback from other people. I feel sure that if he hadn’t been so sure, that if he had shared his vision with someone they would have said ‘Are you insane! You cannot be serious! This is a stupid idea and you are going to p___ everyone off trying to achieve it!’

As we approached our car I noticed that it was covered in the fine dust from his wall and I looked over I thought I might say something to him. Then, when I looked over I actually felt sorry for him. His plan hadn’t worked. The pillars that were left after all his sawing and bashing and smashing were not strong enough and although one or two were still standing most of the wall looked like someone had crashed into it! There were bricks and rubble everywhere on the lawn, on the pavement and dust surrounded the carnage. He was shovelling what was left of it into the back of his truck. I also noticed a hot tub van drive away. Unfortunately the wall had shielded the patio beautifully and provided a really good private space for him to relax in his hot tub. Now he would be in full view of the pedestrians and cars which frequently went by, oh and the buses.

I don’t think I had really wished him ill and as I said I did feel sorry for him. I think I stood there staring, looking shocked and he gave me a sad wave. Do you think it was possible that those neighbours in the ten or so houses he was disturbing on this our first proper sunny, garden enticing back holiday weekend, created so much negative energy that they unwittingly made his wall fall down?

How strange the world is...

How strange the world is...

As we enter the final weeks of January 2013 I thought I reflect back on the beginning of 2013.

It hasn’t been a great start. The bad fortune began for me on Christmas eve, eve. Having been stuck at home for several days I decided I needed a trip to the coast. It’s only a short drive away and while there was some evidence of flooding on local roads there was nothing too bad and I thoroughly enjoyed watching the surfers catching the waves in Wembury – dreaming that I was surfing myself!

My return journey wasn’t quite so straight forward and turning back twice because roads were marked impassable, I continued on to a village near by to attempt to get home ‘the back way’. It was dusk by now and raining again. There was no sign saying the road was blocked so I headed home.  Not long now I thought but without warning I then saw a deeply flooded road ahead. In a split second I made the decision to try to get through – mistake! Within seconds the car was submerged up to the bottom of the doors and I quickly realised the only way out of this mess was for me to wade through the water and go and fetch help. It was dark by now. I reached for my phone. I’d left it behind. Nothing for it but to walk to the lights in the distance. 

I was really lucky as a passing Firefighter and local tow truck just happened to be passing and after a few hours the car was towed away. I didn’t realise at that point that that would be the last I saw of it! I didn’t know how quickly you could write off a car!

What has been more surprising has been how deeply affected I’ve been by this mistake. I obviously felt really stupid at having made that bad decision but then the amount of work and aggravation that ensued to try to get the situation sorted was hard to fathom. Endlessly waiting on the telephone to speak to the insurance company, hours of wading through possible replacement cars and the worry of not knowing how much the insurance company would stump up to replace the car.

It’s only about a month later and we have a great new to us car sitting pretty and waiting to take us out again. It’s true the aggravation and stress levels were high but I’ve been left reflecting that what was truly much worse than the reality of the situation was my reaction to it. My constant worrying and going over the sorry ordeal was a complete waste of time! The reality hasn’t turned out that bad at all. This was just a minor set back for me and my family.  Around the globe people are experiencing much worse traumas and problems that need their strength and fortitude. All I can hope is that I have learned this lesson now. Acceptance and patience is all we can really strive for – I truly hope I can approach the next set back with a calmer perspective.  Come on 2013 let’s have something good!

Inspired by the Big Issue

As the year draws to a close I’d like to share my thoughts about the homeless paper ‘The Big Issue’. I do believe that it is a great idea to offer homeless people a legitimate way to earn their way into a better future. I’ve been inspired by John Bird the papers founder in the November/Dec issue where he argues ‘There is no alternative to getting involved in the day to day world of politics, if you feel that politics is going the wrong way.’

It might not be clear why someone working in the field of health might become interested in politics. Over many years of coping with a chronic health issue myself and working with others struggling with health concerns, I have felt and seen what is like to struggle and work consistently to be able to make a living.  People with chronic ill health and disability will inevitably be amongst the poorest in our society.  I think it’s very sad that the current government is choosing to set different sections of society against each other. Disabled against able bodied, poor against rich and employed against unemployed and most notably with the coining of the phrase ‘strivers’ pitted against ‘skivers’.

It seems to me that the further one gets from the bread line and the longer one has enjoyed the security and standard of living that goes with being a good distance away from the bread line, the easier it is to distance ourselves from the reality of what it is like to be poor.  I question the validity of anyone who has been ‘comfortably off’ for any amount of time to be charged with making economic decisions that will impact mostly on the poor. I believe that we have to work towards a system where it is compulsory that disadvantaged sections of our society are properly represented and truly listened to.

At the moment we have a situation where our most vulnerable people are ‘demonised’ and like John Bird says in the Big Issue, the only way forward is encourage more people to become politically active. He says lets ‘ have a big demo for signing people up to political action...Go out on our high streets and diligently promote your argument. Take every opportunity to get your voice heard.’

For those people who say ‘I’m not interested in politics, it has nothing to do with me’ I would say it has everything to do with you. How much money you pay in tax, how much money you pay for your bills and your food, what the local government has to spend in your area, how your local services, like schools, the fire service and the police service are run. All these areas and most of the areas that affect our daily lives are governed by politics so it has everything to do with us whether we like it or not.

The Big Issue is available from a homeless person on a street corner somewhere near you this Christmas.

Merry Christmas! 

We all need a day of chilling and recovery...

Many thanks to Wendy a great Reiki teacher who introduced me to the wonderful world of Reiki this week.  I’ve been intrigued by Reiki for some time now and have had a few Reiki treatments in the past.  A client of mine, hearing that I was able to do less and less Reflexology because of painful thumbs and back, suggested I could continue to help people with their health through the WiserSelf Plan but with Reiki. I could continue to work with them physically and energetically.  Great!  She sowed the seed for me and I began my journey towards being able to treat using the ancient ‘hands on’ healing of Reiki.

I began with the first part of my training called Reiki 1 which involves an ‘Attunement’.  This consists of a wonderful visualisation which took me on to a plateau with vistas closely resembling the mountains region of Lesotho where I used to live as a volunteer teacher many years ago.  It was great to be taken back to that amazing time in my life and to be surrounded by the mountains and Basotho people again with magnificent views and fond memories of the important rituals I was lucky enough to be part of.

Along with my Reiki self healing instruction and space clearing advice I had a truly relaxing day.  It was so beneficial to be allowed to work on myself for the whole day, an immensely liberating experience to think I don’t have to be any where else and and I don’t have to do anything else accept be here and give myself up to this gentle life affirming experience.

Once again thank you to Wendy for her patience and thoughtfulness.  Now I am going to try to persuade her to join us at WiserHealth, it would be great to have her on the team offering her wonderful skills.

Respect for Women

Has anyone been following The Sun, Page 3 debate which has been playing in the national media this week?

I watched Harriet Harman on BBC Newsnight arguing the case for finally ending page 3 topless women in The Sun newspaper and felt moved by her sheer tenacity.  Did she really say she has been fighting for an end to Page 3 for 20 years! The ex-editor they had arguing the case for the boobs to stay wasn't very impressive but then what possible intelligent reason could he give. 

A day later I went into Peacocks clothes store with my 11 year old daughter and while waiting to pay was confronted with a pile of boxed 'Stress Boobs' on the counter by the till.  Each box carried a scary looking man eagerly squeezing two skin coloured balls with nipples! And sure enough viewed voyeuristically through the plastic display window were two sad looking stress boobs, staring weirdly out at us.

I mentioned to the saleswoman that I wasn't impressed by the 'boobs' and the queue of people behind me looked away in embarrassment.  Why did they do that?  Were they embarrassed by me complaining? By me saying boobs? By me raising the issue? It would have been nice to be supported. I continued anyway and  tried to explain that at exactly child height they were inappropriate and could she please pass this on as a complaint from a customer.  I asked her what she felt. She said children saw 'much worse all the time, out there'. Is that true? Does that make us too accepting and perhaps lazy, happy to just let these things go, and in so doing help perpetuate this terrible disrespect for women?  Does that make us complicit? And is that why we still have a Page 3?

So let's have a mini campaign.  If you go into Peacocks and the boobs are there, complain. 

Janet Wise

Overcoming Adversity

'Overcoming Adversity' is the theme for our Armada Speakers get together on 4th September.  We'll be celebrating the amazing achievements of the paralympic athletes and offering our unique blend of prepared and off the cuff speaking.

Please note our change of venue.  We are moving to The Astor Hotel, in Elliot Street, Plymouth and are assured of a warm welcome from Joesph Louei and his staff.  We'll meet in the Churchill Suite at our usual time of 7pm for a prompt 7.15 start.

I'm still really enjoying my Armada Speakers experience because I meet really friendly people there and hear challenging and interesting speeches.  I gave my seventh speech last week and came out the winner in the prepared speech category!  My speech was entitled 'The Perils of Five a day'.  I used a clip from Jamie Oliver's TED speech, about the increase in obesity and crisis with food choices for Americans and their children. I made comparisons with what's happening here in the UK. The content seemed to strike a cord with the audience and I had good feed back.  The 'perils' I spoke of was the misunderstanding I held for a while that I could eat anything I wanted as long as I had my five fruit and vegetables a day.  That didn't quite work out. I'm about two stone lighter now, I'm pleased to have found a better way of eating thanks to help from Ramin my acupuncturist.  Making friends with food is a fundamental part of our work at WiserHealth,  finding a balanced way of eating, exercising and living that keeps us happy and well.

My fascination with and sometimes obsessions with food and health takes me on some interesting journeys.  Does this happen for you?  If you'd like to know more or share ideas please don't hesitate to contact me.

See you on Tuesday at the Astor Hotel, guests made especially welcome.  Don't forget drinks afterwards in the bar.  Let's share our voices, practice being heard and being a good listener and have fun at the same time.

Janet Wise

Dawn French - one woman's inspiring story

Hi
I hope all you parents out there are coping OK with this challenging summer weather and managing to keep your charges happy and occupied.  I know it can be quite an ordeal and I'm filled with admiration when I see women (I know there are plenty of men doing this too but I've only seen women so far) trailing children around and still sounding positive!  We'll done!  It's not easy and you're doing a great job!

A book that is also really inspiring me at the moment is 'Dear Fatty' by Dawn French.  I was really moved by this passage where Dawn recalls her dad's words as she is about to embark on her first teenage party.  He reveals that she nearly died as a baby and speaking as he would have spoken she continues:

It was then we knew that having a baby girl, having you, completed our little family.  That's all we ever wanted.  The four of us together forever.  We had so much to look forward to, so much to learn.  So much to do, so much fun to have...  You and your brother are our life, our reason and our happiness. We adore you both and we feel blessed to have you, and to witness you grow into the remarkable young people you are becoming.  You are both so impressive! Truly, you are our world, our joy.  Never forget what a treasure you are and if your faith in that ever wobbles, have a look in the mirror and have confidence in what you see.  You are a rare thing, an uncommon beauty, a dazzling, exquisite, splendid young woman.  Look!  You must know it's true, you're a corker.  How lucky any boy would be to have you on his arm.  They should fight tournaments to win your affection, they should kill for your favour.  Don't dare be grateful for their attentions, you utterly deserve it and more than that, you deserve the very best.  Don't think for one second you should settle for other people's rejects.  You are the princess, you are the prize, so be choosy and take your time.  You decide how, when and where not them.  They will wait.  Of course they will.  Who wouldn't wait for someone so priceless?  There is no one better.  Know this: if anything ever happened to you, Moo, our lives would fall apart, we would be devastated and this family would never be the same again.  So you must take care of yourself, you must guard against danger. When you are out of this house it is up to you to protect yourself, your reputation and your dignity. We love you and we need you.

I think this is amazing!  I really wish my mum or dad had said something like this to me and I am certainly passing these sentiments on to my children. Thanks Dawn!  I'm really, really enjoying this book, it is so warm and brings back so many fond memories.

Janet